not a good day...

Today is not a good day. Period. I’ve been struggling not to cry. I feel so bad. I feel so terribly bad. I will remember this day for the rest of my life. Someone I care about hurt my feelings. And I don’t know when I will be able to talk

to that person again. I know I will be able to forgive, but uncertain when I will forget. It hurt so much. I feel like crying right at this moment… I want to do something that will take my mind off things. I want to run… run as fast as I could without looking back. Then maybe, maybe when I’m loosing my breath, when my lungs can’t take the pressure, when I’m dead tired, I will be able to forget.

Funny how I think of ways on what to do to ease the pain, yet I am

doing nothing… I am so tired even to run… my knees are wobblin

g like that of a child whose about to take his first step… sadly, unlike him, I am not willing to take a step…

From now on I will simplify my life. I will get rid of things that are constantly hurting me, for they do me no good. I am about to change my life for the better. I will focus on my family. I will disregard somebody else’s issues and

look at mine and try to resolve them on the best possible way. I

will not be defeated by myself. I will conquer my fears and work it on my advantage. (That includes always counting myself as a second priority) I will live life the way God wants me to. And I know he doesn’t want me hurting like this.